I was the first passenger on board the aircraft and headed back to 19A to stow my bag and give the flight attendants some chocolates. Turns out that the passenger boarding directly behind me was a friend and so I found myself standing in what was definitely not my seat chatting with her as more passengers came on board. Around passenger number 10, seat 22B boarded. He looked towards me and I figured I was standing in his seat. I was not; but I’m pretty sure he had no idea if I was or not. To say that he was drunk does a disservice to the word. He couldn’t read the seat number signs overhead nor form a coherent phrase.

And so as he mumbled off “22B” I managed to point him to that seat. I figured I was being helpful. Plus I didn’t really want to smell the alcohol anymore. His response was to ask me if I was a flight attendant but all he managed to get out was “Are you a f%^$ing” before he lost his train of thought and retreated to the seat. My friend and I exchanged glances and both knew right away that this was trouble.

From there things got worse. Mr. 22B managed to try out a few more seats on the plane and started to cause concerns amongst other passengers. And, fortunately, the flight attendants.

As boarding wrapped up the Gate Agent came on board and collected Mr. 22B, escorting him to the front of the plane. Up to this point I’m pretty sure the guy had no idea what was going on. Only once out on the jet bridge, when he started protesting that he wasn’t carrying any contraband, did it start to sink in that he was in trouble. And then the boarding door closed and we were off to New Orleans. I hope he sobers up and gets on the late flight tonight. But, mostly, I’m just really happy he wasn’t on this flight.

This isn’t the first time a drunk guy has been bounced off a flight I was on. It is, however, the first time he had no idea what was going on. Whoopsie.